On the other side of town, news of the nuclear war has terrified Da Qiao. Except THERE IS NO NUCLEAR WAR.
Sun Ce's at home with the kids (as usual)
She's crying because there's a baby crying (and the baby crying is HER). This is either a paradox or really stupid.
BUT SHE'S CUTE
The next morning...
Sun Ce: Da, I swear your boobs are getting bigger.
Da Qiao: Ce! Don't be such a perv!
Sun Ce: What's the big deal? I married you without 'em, didn't I?
Da Qiao: I always had them!
Sun Ce: Indeed you did... but now they're BIGGER! Like your sister's!
Da Qiao: SUN CE I AM GOING TO KICK YOUR--
Sun Ce: Doesn't that feel /good/, baby~? Just forget all your troubles (and your rages)
Da Qiao: Ohhh that does feel good... I'm still going to kick your ass, though~
Sun Ce: NOT IF I SEDUCE YOU FIRST~
Da Qiao: Oh all right fine. I'll kick your ass once this bowling ball is out of the way.
Sun Ce: And to think I let my guard down.
(This is why they have so many kids.)
Zhen Ji had another kid, I forgot to check back on her when she was pregnant (I know you're disappointed)
Babies are boring, but before I aged the toddler up, I aged up Kelsie
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
SHE'S SO CUTE! Finally someone in this family is cute (yes Rui I'm looking at you)
But then I aged up the new baby, Gale
OH MY LORD HE'S THE DEFINITION OF CUTE (he looks like his mom!)
Cao Pi: Gale looks like you, dear!
Zhen Ji: It's about time! Rui and Kelsie look just like you!
Cao Pi: Aren't Rui and Kelsie the ugly ones? D:
Kelsie: I grew up better looking than you~
Rui: Yeah, but I grew up smarter than you.
Kelsie: If by smarter you mean dorkier!
Rui: At least I know how to read!
Kelsie: It's not my fault they aged me up before teaching me!
Back to Da Qiao...
Da Qiao: I can't wait until you're out of me, so I can kick your father's--
Da Qiao: OW OW OW OW OW! After three of these you THINK I'd be used to--OOOOOOW
Sun Ce: OH MY GOD HONEY ARE YOU OKAY OH MY GOD IT'S HAPPENING, HER STOMACH IS EATING ITSELF--DA HONEY I'LL GET YOU TO THE HOSPITAL OH MY GOD--
Da Qiao: Ce you idiot I'm having the baby!
Sun Ce: Oh. OH MY GOD SHE'S HAVING THE--
Da Qiao: I--am--going--to--kill--you--
Sun Ce: RUN BABY RUN RUN RUUUUUUUUN
Da Qiao: I can't run! I am never bearing your children again!
And of course, when she walks out of the hospital with baby Rory, she's already having 'have another baby' wishes.
HOLY **** KILL IT WITH FIRE
RENJI <3
What's Jessica staring at?
I should have guessed!
Jen: YOU'RE A MONSTER
Jen: I can't believe they let freaks like you out in the world! And I saw you looking at my husband you FREAK
Ling Tong: Jen, she was asking for an autograph, not a blood donation!
Jen: Shut up! Make me a sandwich!
Ling Tong: Yes dear.
Vampire: I wouldn't touch a hair on your pretty boy's head anyway! I like my meat MANLY!
Jen: Hey, Tong's all man, you shut up!
Ling Tong: I'm pretty AND manly :o At least our kids will still be hot after that vampire finishes mangling my wife.
However, Jen is DOING the mangling here
Jen: Victory, thy name is Jen!
Vampire: Ow... I would have won were we fighting at night!
Jen: I'll take that wager!
Over at the Abarai household
Rangiku: Renji, I'm doing the dishes! SLURP
Renji: Are you DOING the dishes or are you LICKING the dishes?
Rangiku: Have I told you how sexy I find you today? SLURP
Renji: That does it, you're going stir crazy. We're going out!
CLUB TIME (empty again except for two schlubs)
I love the club dance animations
Renji: Have I told YOU how sexy I find you today?
Rangiku: 37 times, but I can hear it again~
Fish: WE MIGHT BE VIRTUAL BUT WE STILL HAVE EYES, Y'KNOW
And then it's more practice for Rangiku...
She sleeps in her underwear. I know you're THRILLED
God dammit I think Renji knocked her up :(
Renji: Either that or she drank too much of this. Ew.
Rory ages up!
AAAAAAAAAAH
CUUUUUUUUTE
Finally a baby with his mother's coloring!
While Xiang here just continues to be an anomaly.
Xiang: I love you Daddy!
Sun Ce: *sob* SAY IT AGAIN
Xiang: Oh geez.
Sun family <3 Who wins in a DILF fight, Sun Ce or Cao Pi?
Da Qiao: Ce, I've been meaning to ask you. Why don't you invite your father to come stay with us? I know he wants to see the kids, and after all, we ARE the Sun family!
Sun Ce: Uhhh, if you think that's wise...
Sun Ce: What could possibly go wrong?
~THE NEXT DAY~
Xiang: Uh, why are all those people crowded outside our house?
Sun Ce: HOLY COW, POP! I said come to stay for a few weeks, not bring the whole family!
Sun Jian: But there was nothing I could do about it, son!
Sun Jian: Your brother still lives at home, and your sister and her sperm donor are here too, it's not like I can just leave! How will they survive without me?
Sun Ce: How any of us are going to survive when Da comes down here and wastes us, you mean!
Sun Shang Xiang: Ning's not a SPERM DONOR! He's my HUSBAND!
Gan Ning: I married her, didn't I? Your old man's a pain in the ass.
Sun Ce: All right Shang Xiang you can live with us, but the sperm donor has to live outside.
Sun Shang Xiang: Nice try.
Gan Ning: I CAN HEAR YOU!
Sun Jian: Son, I promise, we won't be in the way at all. HUG~
Sun Ce: Sure, pop. But everyone else has to go anyway.
Sun Jian: Dammit.
Da Qiao: Oh goody we have a nanny now so we can go out and party! WOO!
Sun Ce: This does not bode well...
Meanwhile, Jen and Ling Tong have reunited
Pushover.
Toshiie and Keiji are currently at each other's throats
And Rangiku, looking 11 months pregnant...
Who says a pregnant lady can't still be hot?
Except when she tries to club dance. MY EYES.
Renji: Can we name it Zabimaru?
Rangiku: NO.
Renji: But it's talking to me right now! DADDY, NAME ME ZABIMARU
Rangiku: Nice try.
Rangiku: AAAAGH! RENJI!
Renji: AHA! It DOES want to be named Zabimaru!
Rangiku: It set the contractions off in rage! It hates the name!
Renji: Spoilsport!
Rangiku: I--hate--you--Renji--Abarai--
Renji: *sob* I hate myself too!
It's a girl!
Renji: Zabimaru can swing both ways, y'know--
Rangiku: ZIP IT.
Now it's back to band practice, because I want Squad 13 to finally start getting some gigs!
ICHIGO WHAT ARE YOU DOING...
With that guitar. Yeah.
Ichigo had to go to ~WORK~, to be a productive member of society or whatever, but Renji and Rangiku (R&R) head to a bar to try and get some money so they can feed their child.
AND THE CROWD GOES WILD... or not.
Actually, they were pretty generous with the tips. Okuni tipped $19, and Seong Mi-na (WIP) tipped not once, not twice, BUT THREE TIMES. :D Remind me to finish un-fugifying her face.
R&R get home, dismiss the babysitter, promptly lose all their tips by paying her $75, only to find... THIS.
Renji: Ichigo how did you get in my house!?
Rangiku: More importantly, why did we have to pay that babysitter $75 when you were here all along!?
Renji: There there, my precious little Zabi--I mean, uh, (I forgot the kid's name -_-), Daddy will never let that rotten Kurosaki anywhere near you ever again~
Ichigo: I CAN HEAR YOU, ABARAI
Renji: GOOD!
I age the kid up... hmm, who does she look like?
She's a clone of her mother! (No offense Renji, but YAY)
I can't wait to see what she looks like when she gets older!!
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